Signs of the Apocalypse, Part 10: “Drill Here, Drill Now” by Aaron Tippin


The first (and hopefully last) song ever inspired by Newt Gingrich — and the only song I am aware of that actually disses alternative energy — certainly makes the list, even if it hadn’t debuted on the Sean Hannity show:

All together now:

Drill here, drill now
How ’bout some oil from our own soil that belongs to us anyhow
No more debatin’ we’re tired of waitin’ everybody shout out loud
Drill here, drill now

A classic case of poetic license undercutting the message. The debate concerned coastal drilling, not “oil from our own soil.” I for one am still waiting to hear from Warner EMI about whether they will pick up my newly recorded single, “Cruel Hoax.”

This certainly wins Aaron Tippin the prize for one of the most poorly timed songs in history, as the Democrats rolled over on the issue within days, and now people are talking about $50 oil (see “Q: Will we see $3 gasoline before $5?“). That’s life in Realityville. The full lyrics have also been nominated for the most unintentionally funny country song of the year:

Hello…..Is anybody out there listenin’ in Washington D.C.
This is the suffering voice of America crying out for relief
Now I don’t know what a gallon of gas costs up on Capitol Hill
But we sure know what it costs down here in Realityville
And the damage already done has been a mighty heavy toll
And if we’re gonna fix it we gotta start right here at home

CHORUS:
Drill here, drill now
How ’bout some oil from our own soil that belongs to us anyhow
No more debatin’ we’re tired of waitin’ everybody shout out loud
Drill here, drill now

Every time a foreign tanker pulls up to our shore
They got us over a barrel while they bleed us a little more
And think how much it costs just to bring it all that way
And how many American jobs that’d make if we were drillin’ in the USA
Oh and God forbid if our oily friends should decide to cut us off
We’d be standin’ around with our britches down now listen to me ya’ll

REPEAT CHORUS

Well the winds of change are blowin’
Yes and we recognize that need
But tractors, trucks, cars and planes can’t run on tomorrow’s dreams
So while we’re workin’ on the future we can’t ignore today
Cuz who knows how much time the alternative might take
Somethin’s gotta be done right now cuz friends it won’t be long
Before this great big country comes grinding to a halt

REPEAT CHORUS

Hmm. I wonder what BioWillie Nelson would say about that last verse? Gristmill debunks many of the GOP talking lyrics.

I also wonder if Tippin appreciates the irony of his unintentionally prescient final words: “it won’t be long Before this great big country comes grinding to a halt.” Maybe his next song can be about how George Bush and the Republican Party destroyed the global economy.

Note: Although this is Part 10, this is the first post actually labeled a “sign of the apocalypse.” This occasional series is dedicated to all those who have been Left Behind by the reality of human-caused global warming. As Wikipedia explains,

Apocalypse (Greek: “lifting of the veil”) is a term applied to the disclosure to certain privileged persons of something hidden from the majority of humankind. Today the term is often used to refer to the end of the world, which may be a shortening of the phrase apokalupsis eschaton which literally means “revelation at the end of the æon, or age”.

I welcome suggestions from readers on either signs. And, yes, gallows humor is always appreciated here, as evidenced by the fact that this post — More conclusive proof of global warming — was so popular.

Other signs of the Apocalypse:

This entry was posted on Saturday, October 11th, 2008 at 10:57 amand is filed under Humor. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

6 Responses to “Signs of the Apocalypse, Part 10: “Drill Here, Drill Now” by Aaron Tippin”

  1. Russ Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 11:53 am

    How about that practically the only substantial campaign journalism is being done by the likes of Katie Couric, David Letterman, and the View panel?

    (Bad attempt at humor follows- )
    A: Who’s pallin’ around with terrorists?
    B: That’s right - Palin.
    A: That’s what I asked - who’s pallin’?
    B: Palin’s the one who’s pallin’. Anyone who wants to keep us addicted to oil.

    (Soory about that - I’m not a comedian. :) Maybe somebody else can do something with it.)

  2. Brian D Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 1:31 pm

    Disgraceful. What happened to anthems of inspiration and hope? I stopped listening to country roughly a decade ago and even then they were commonplace — I recall several that were stoically refusing to give up hope on the issues of the day (for instance, The Change).

    By the way, Joe, it appears that your post cuts off after its last link.

  3. Rick Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    I have a sudden desire to purchase a pick up truck and haul stuff around. Can’t explain it.

  4. Gary Herstein Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 8:50 pm

    “Left Behind by … reality”

    I want that to be by new “handle.” I just can’t think of any good place to use it …

    As for gallows humor, I just can’t get the hang of it.

  5. Kathy N Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 10:49 pm

    Don’t worry folks, with the price dropping (a least right now) and the oil companies taking it in the shorts from IKE, the word is that the hit on their stocks on Friday took them oh so by surprise. It couldn’t have happened to a sleaser (is that a word?) well you know what I mean. bunch of SOB’s.
    thats putting it in cowboy talk.

  6. Kathy N Says:
    October 11th, 2008 at 10:52 pm

    my last line is missing form the above post. Here it is So It will be a cold day you know where before we see any of them drilling anywhere.

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